As much as I long to see my sweet boy and to have him here in our arms, I am cherishing this blessed time that I have to carry him. Pregnancy has shown me more emotional, exhausting, awkward, painful moments than any other single experience in my life. But it has also been the most incredible privilege. I wish that there were words powerful enough to convey the depth of my love for my Heavenly Father, my husband, and my son. Because that is what pregnancy has been for me. The opportunity to carry this sweet, little child: Heavenly Father's child, Ryan's child, my child. Something more beautiful or sacred, I cannot imagine.
So here I sit; swollen belly exposed, laptop resting on the bulge, listening to Ryan and his music as he does his homework in the other room, completely and utterly happy, enjoying these final days of pregnancy.
I want to take this opportunity to reminisce (which btw is defined as "indulge[ing] in enjoyable recollection of past events.... and I quite like that!) about these blessed 9 months! So feel free to indulge with me...
I love the way Ryan looks at my belly. Sometimes when I ask him for a kiss, he automatically kisses my belly. And then only after he has kissed our son, he kisses me. He talks to our little baby, in words I can't understand (Spanish...), and I am constantly grateful for the incredible bond my two boys share already. I love the way the Gus can feel Ryan touching my belly and instantly gets as close to his daddy as he can. The way Ryan's eyes light up as he looks at me when he feels the "Hi! Hi dad! I love you! Hi... You're my dad!!! I know it!" coming from inside me.
I love watching my stomach roll and reel like waves whenever my little guy gets the urge to move around in the ever-shrinking space provide for his ever-increasing self.
I love my 3 pillows, 2 body pillows and 1 rolled up comforter that make sleep a possibility. And once again, let's take a moment to love my husband. Because really, this man has surrendered much of his portion of our bed to my severe pillow addiction, and he should be applauded or given a gold medal or something!
I love swimming. I can almost hear people's thoughts or see little thought bubbles popping out of their heads whenever I show up at the pool, but I just could not care less. Yes, I am very much with child and no, I did not steal the beach ball and hide it under my shirt... But, I fully intend to enjoy every gravity-defying moment the pool has to offer. So there. Go ahead and stare at me trudging around, in and out of the water, to and from the bathroom. Because ya know what, swimming is my BFF.
I love going to the temple. I have only been able to go just once during this wonderful time, but being in the temple with my sweet fellow in my belly was just incredible.
I love the almost constant work-out my husband willingly commits to as he helps me in and out and up and down and over and any other way I might need.
I love the way that this experience has brought me closer to the ones I love.
I love the way I love my mom, and the way that becoming a mother myself has allowed our relationship to grow more than I thought possible.
I love my belly button. Ryan insists it is something similar to a turkey timer. This little thing has been starting the process for quite some time, but he is convinced that because it is completely popped that baby is done cooking and should come out... now. Which I guess is not really that far off! But more than its tendency to stick out, I love the way Bella, my two year old niece, is endlessly fascinated by it. She loves to pull up my shirt and play with my belly button. An activity that inevitably leads to "Oh its all dirty!... I get a wipe." Which is followed by her speedy quick running to get a baby wipe and then proceeding to clean my belly button for me. I tell you what, I have the cleanest belly button around thanks to that little lady :)
I don't generally love bare belly pictures... and don't even get me started on the weirdo I'm holding my boobies to cover them up while trying to look all natural and sexy with my huge naked self maternity pictures. I mean really. Pregnancy is beautiful, and our changing shapes and the life inside is something to celebrate, but honey put some freaking clothes on. You are just making everyone feel awkward...... Hey! I thought I told you not to get me started! Well anyway, back on track, I love my belly. Every last stretch-marked inch of it. And this view is one that I will miss. And since we are reminiscing, I will share this tiny bit of bare belly with you.
I love the endless grunts and groans that accompany any attempt to move or re-position my entire self. I am not even sure these sounds come from me exactly, its more like protests coming directly from my whale-like body resisting even the thought of me moving. I also love how cute everyone seems to think this whole interchange can be.
I love family prayer. This is something that Ryan and I have done the entirety of our marriage. I have always been grateful for the closeness it brings. I love that now it always includes, in both the words spoken and the motion and kicks I feel inside, our son.
I guess we could easily sum this whole thing up into one simple and true statement: I love being pregnant. I am so grateful to have this opportunity, and I feel so blessed that Heavenly Father has entrusted Ryan and I with this precious little spirit. Any day now this dear one will make his appearance! And the joy of that day I can't even imagine. But until then... Here I shall be, loving this journey!
One final picture for you to enjoy...
I love my belly button. Ryan insists it is something similar to a turkey timer. This little thing has been starting the process for quite some time, but he is convinced that because it is completely popped that baby is done cooking and should come out... now. Which I guess is not really that far off! But more than its tendency to stick out, I love the way Bella, my two year old niece, is endlessly fascinated by it. She loves to pull up my shirt and play with my belly button. An activity that inevitably leads to "Oh its all dirty!... I get a wipe." Which is followed by her speedy quick running to get a baby wipe and then proceeding to clean my belly button for me. I tell you what, I have the cleanest belly button around thanks to that little lady :)
I don't generally love bare belly pictures... and don't even get me started on the weirdo I'm holding my boobies to cover them up while trying to look all natural and sexy with my huge naked self maternity pictures. I mean really. Pregnancy is beautiful, and our changing shapes and the life inside is something to celebrate, but honey put some freaking clothes on. You are just making everyone feel awkward...... Hey! I thought I told you not to get me started! Well anyway, back on track, I love my belly. Every last stretch-marked inch of it. And this view is one that I will miss. And since we are reminiscing, I will share this tiny bit of bare belly with you.
I love the endless grunts and groans that accompany any attempt to move or re-position my entire self. I am not even sure these sounds come from me exactly, its more like protests coming directly from my whale-like body resisting even the thought of me moving. I also love how cute everyone seems to think this whole interchange can be.
I love family prayer. This is something that Ryan and I have done the entirety of our marriage. I have always been grateful for the closeness it brings. I love that now it always includes, in both the words spoken and the motion and kicks I feel inside, our son.
I guess we could easily sum this whole thing up into one simple and true statement: I love being pregnant. I am so grateful to have this opportunity, and I feel so blessed that Heavenly Father has entrusted Ryan and I with this precious little spirit. Any day now this dear one will make his appearance! And the joy of that day I can't even imagine. But until then... Here I shall be, loving this journey!
One final picture for you to enjoy...
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